A Dark Cloud

I was chatting with a friend of mine the other day and she aptly described what HIV and the disease AIDS does to people. She said, "It is like a Dark Cloud that hovers over you and never leaves." I could never have put it any better than that.

For people out there who have been infected and are affected by HIV know exactly what this feeling it. Personally, i am in anguish everyday. Some days, the darkness is thicker than the others but it is always dark in here.

My name is Dorene Namanya. I had my first encounter with HIV at 9 years. I was in Primary five at the time and all i really cared about was playing rounders, dodge ball and painfully crushing on a boy who never really noticed me except to ask me to do his English Homework. Life was good.

Since my first interaction with HIV, my world has seemed to revolve around it since and my future as i kvow it has since been shaped by this cruel, senseless, pitiless, shameless, undiscriminating disease. I have carried its burdens daily to the point that sometimes when they do become too heavy, i crumble and weep. Silently some times and other times, i bleat like i were a goat. I have thought about getting therapy, but not only am i awfully protective of my secrets it feels like a betrayal, but also because i think the therapist will think i am a silly, over assuming, self entitled girl. I mean, mine could not be the worst story out there, so why am i wasting her/his time telling him about it?

And so here I am with my plan B. Making you all my therapists. Very glad that i don't get to see the pity in your eyes. Or the rejection from an emotion not shared. Welcome to my AIDS blog. When i come to unburden my soul, and maybe help one or two others unburden theirs too.